How does “What makes you feel cared for” work?
You go through eleven everyday moments, such as a hard day at work or a birthday. In the first seven, you tap what would mean the most to you and then what would come next. In the last four, you tap what you’d most likely do for someone you love. From your picks we write two short lines, like “What makes Mei feel cared for: Time together and kind words” and “How Mei shows care: Help with things”, which the people you’re introduced to see under Getting to know you. We work them out from what you choose, rather than asking you to label yourself, because that tends to give a truer picture. They aren’t used for matching.
The seven kinds of care
- Time together
- Kind words
- Help with things
- Physical affection
- Thoughtful gifts
- Backing my goals
- Being there when it’s hard
In the first seven moments, each offers five of these, so each kind of care comes up equally often. In the last four, every moment offers all seven.
How your lines are worked out
- Your first choice in each moment counts more than your second.
- If one kind of care clearly stands out, the line names it. If two stand out together, it names both.
- If no kind stands out, the line says so. That’s a common result, not a failed test.
Everyone values all of these to some degree. The lines show where you lean, not the only thing that matters to you.
Why ask how you show care too
How people show care and how they most like to receive it are often different. Someone who shows it by helping out may most want time together in return. Seeing both lines helps the other person notice your care when you show it, and know what would mean the most to you.
Why it’s not used for matching
There’s no good evidence that two people who lean the same way get on better. What helps is knowing how the other person likes to be cared for, so it’s shown as something to know about each other, not used to decide who you meet.
Retake or hide them
Go to Profile, then Getting to know you. Turn a line off under What your matches see to hide it, or open the section again to retake it. Each retake starts fresh. If you finished this section before the last four moments were added, it shows New: how you show care; open it to add your second line.